You know baby season is over when:
you suddenly have more money in your checking account than in the change jar
you have more time for the hobbies you forgot about
you have dinners that don't come from a drive-in window, or
you have dinners that take longer than six minutes to make
your pets don't think you are a "stranger in the house"
you actually find out what the word vacation means
you start to remember birthdays and vacations again
you start to like Ma Bell and the answering machine again
you have a conversation that doesn't contain the phrase: "what color is its poop?"
those dark circles under your eyes, your raccoon imitation, disappear
your house starts to have a pleasant odor
your neighbors stop peaking through the knowholes in your fence to see why all the cars are coming up your driveway
you aren't embarrassed to have people step into your house when a month earlier at least 86% of your house had to be engulfed in flames before you would have let firemen see how you lived
you no longer have to worry about being arrested by the narc team because someone hands you a suspicious looking shoebox in the local greasy spoon's parking lot at 11:00 p.m.
you husband puts the cheese your mother made on his spaghetti instead of the esbilac in the look alike jar-sorry Jack!
you don't set your alarm every two hours
you don't get out of bed every morning muttering, "It's time to make the donuts, uh, formula"
you suddenly remember you can go shopping and not have to rush home to feed the babies
you stop asking yourself, "WHY am I doing this to myself?"
you no longer hold a pencil like its a feeding syringe
there aren't 15 smelly containers of spoiling formula on your kitchen counter
your shirt is clean instead of the normal garb of so much food, formula and other splatters you can play connect the dots with
you stop feeling like YOU need to be rehabbed!
you actually look forward to getting another critter in!
-Jan Jackson